Tossing and Tortured 'Till Dawn

I come back to you now, at the turn of the tide.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

I just got back from riding a bit over five hours, and I really don't have the energy to write very much about it, but I need to be in a roughly sitting position for the next fourteen minutes to get full use of my Compex Muscle Zapper. What the hell is a Compex, anyway, and why would you want to zap your muscles? Because it feels great, that's why.

These little suckers have half a dozen different settings, from "potentiation" (that means "warm-up" in badly-translated Swedish) through "explosive strength" and "active recovery." While I can't vouch for it actually making me stronger, and certainly it hasn't made me explode, for goodness sake, but that last one is just awesome.

I've never been a pro cyclist who has a soigneur to massage his legs after every race, but I imagine it would feel something like this. Physical therapists and chiropractors have been using electrostimulation to help with muscle pain, imbalanaces, and rehabilitation for some time. Recently, through some tricky new technology that's beyond my understanding, Compex has developed these little hand-held units with a lot of the same kick.

It feels like a wonderfully relaxing deep-tissue massage, only through electrodes. If you have the opportunity to try one out, definitely take it, although at $800 I can't exactly recommend purchasing a new one. (I didn't happen to pay for mine)

Seriously, I stopped using this thing for a couple of weeks because I misplaced the charger to it and slacked off on finding it, and after a long rides my quads were so tense that they were pulling my kneecap all sorts of ugly ways. Then a hard effort up a twelve percent climb strained something badly, and I could barely walk for a couple of days it was all so sore.

Granted, I didn't replace the Zapping with any conventional self-massage or stretching, which I know I should have been doing, but hey, if I can get a free massage

NOW all it needs to be able to do is impersonate some cute Swedish girl...

Okay, so I didn't talk much about my ride in the rain, but my fourteen minutes are up. It's time to go take a nap, wake up, and eat about two thousand calories, then do it all again manana.


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